Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Still No Room at the Inn

The Damm family: Crissy, six; Jesse, four; their mother, Linda, 27, a former nursing-home aide; and their stepfather, Dean, 33, an ex-trucker.
According to the U.S. Conference of Mayors, more than one third of the nation's homeless population-and its fastest growing segment-consists of families with children. The reason for this is twofold. At the same time as the number of families living below the poverty line has increased because of unemployment and cuts in welfare benefits, the availability of low-cost housing has dropped because of widespread urban gentrification and a radical decline in the federal budget for subsidized housing. Once a family is homeless, they are likely to encounter discrimination when they seek emergency shelter. In Los Angeles, for example, only 51 of the county's 215 shelters accept families, and of those only 16 accept families with fathers. Though homeless individuals often live outside-on sidewalks, on park benches, beneath freeway overpasses-homeless families are more likely to be hidden from the public eye, living marginally from night to night in shelters, welfare hotels and cars. The Damms, who moved recently to California from Colorado, are such a family. LIFE spent seven days with the Damms during the fifth week in which they had no place to call home.

More here

Monday, December 15, 2008

Sunday, December 14, 2008

It Should Have Been a Sack of Shit



A real sack of shit, like the target.

Bonus

"...he dodged those things like they were “Vietnam”.”
hanx to Attaturk via stringonastick

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Dirty Fucking Hippie YouTube Monday (Late)



As teh wingnuts say - "Now you do what they told ya."

Sunday, November 30, 2008

Dirty Fucking Hippie YouTube Monday



I'd love this song even without the swearing, and Chrissie Hynde really rocks it.

Bonus update: The MTV-friendly no-swearing Radiohead original version is here.

As for the gap between my last post and this one - it was a combination tryptophan overdose and military funeral.

Monday, November 24, 2008

Dirty Fucking Hippie YouTube Monday



A most beautiful love song, perhaps the most beautiful and poignant. I like this rendition cuz it's in the best dirty fucking hippie tradition - completely from the heart. I also really dig the map of Australia in the background.

If you want a more polished version, here's The Band doing it up in the fine movie, The Last Waltz.

And finally, here's Rick Danko in a solo performance less than 20 years later, and not long before he died.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

A Dry Drunk No More

"On the next one, hold the egg white. And the bitters.
And the sugar syrup. And the lime juice."


While attending APEC in Lima, Bush partakes of a traditional Peruvian drink known as a "Pisco Sour."

There are many ways to make one, but they all involve the form of brandy made in Chile and Peru known as pisco.

I said it a few short days ago: I predict that the worthless piece of shit who goes by the name of George W. Bush will die a lonely and un-mourned alcohol-related death, either as the result of acute alcohol poisoning, or from a fall or other accident while drunk.

Can we just take the keys of the nation away from him now?

Hankx to Dependable Renegade via Fightin' Digby

Saturday, November 22, 2008

All About the Benjamins


"You can rape their women and kill their children, but don't ever fuck with their money."
- My mother

Since money's at the top of most people's minds these day, I've added a new blogroll on the subject. The blogs on the list are all going to be by people who actually know what they're talking about, so it won't include any wingnuts or objects of their adoration. Fuck them.

Anywhoozle, the first blogs on the list are by Paul Krugman, Elizabeth Warren and colleagues, my two favorite economic writers at Daily Kos - Jerome a Paris and Bonddad, and the RGE Monitor featuring Nouriel Roubini.

I'll add to the list, and toss in my own thoughts, from time to time, for as long as our collapsing economic system allows.

For now, let's just take a listen to Mr. Roubini...



Hanx to Fightin' Digby

Friday, November 21, 2008

Oblivious as Always



Perhaps Mad Jack should have chosen one of the turkeys as his running mate?

Thursday, November 20, 2008

World Leaders to Bush, "Go Fuck Yourself."



What's there not to despise?

My prediction: FratBoy becomes the first ex-presidential suicide - alcohol poisoning. You read it here first.

Monday, November 17, 2008

Dirty Fucking Hippie YouTube Monday

Well, maybe more like Dirty Fucking Post-Glam, Neo-Psychadelic, Goth/Metal Not Grunge YouTube Monday Unplugged...



I love the song, and I like this one best of the available versions. It's not a self-indulgent art video, it's a straight up performance that features all 4 members of the band, not just super control freak Billy Corgan. And we can actually hear D'arcy's backup vocals.

I used to have a thing for D'arcy - blond hair, pale skin, dark lipstick. Oh, yeah.

Friday, November 14, 2008

Read it and Weep, Wingnuts

Minnesota Governor Tom Pawlenty, speaking at the recent repub governors' conference:

“We cannot be a majority governing party when we essentially cannot compete in the Northeast, we are losing our ability to compete in Great Lakes States, we cannot compete on the West Coast, we are increasingly in danger of competing in the Mid-Atlantic States, and the Democrats are now winning some of the Western States,” he said. “That is not a formula for being a majority governing party in this nation.”

“And similarly we cannot compete, and prevail, as a majority governing party if we have a significant deficit, as we do, with women, where we have a large deficit with Hispanics, where we have a large deficit with African-American voters, where we have a large deficit with people of modest incomes and modest financial circumstances,” he said. “Those are not factors that make up a formula for success going forward.”

Well, Tom's being a little too optimistic with his fellow repubs. They've lost the Upper Midwest/Great lakes region, they've lost the Mid-Atlantic region, they've lost Colorado and New Mexico. Georgia and Montana will be next to turn blue, with Arizona not too far behind.

Or, to begin painting the picture...

This information is probably too...real for wingnut consumption. That's their political party over in the lower right hand corner of the square.

Fuck reality. They'd much rather rub one out over their current saviorette.

Hanx to DenFromCT for turning me on to the cool graphic. Read more here.

All hail, Dark Lord Kos.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Let's Ride!


animated gif ripped off from Sadly, No!
(who ripped it off from Shabooty.com)

Thoughts in Response to a Post-Election Analysis by Buggs Bunny's Evil Twin


Separated at birth, reunited at whim.

I first mentioned my online wingnut buddy a few weeks ago, and have continued to visit his low-traffic blog because...well, I don't know why, exactly, except maybe because he's just not gratuitously mean-spirited or cowardly, as virtually all other wingnuts are.

Or maybe I'm just a sucker for his goofy, good-hearted grin.

I'm generally curious about what he thinks, even though what he thinks is generally pretty fucking whack and about as wrong as wrong can be.

For example, in his quick post-election analysis of the seriously fucked condition of the repubs he writes:
Sen. McCain divided and conquered to win the Republican nod and could not do much more.

I think that the best thing that he did was chose Alaska governor Sarah Palin as his running mate. She is not going anywhere because now she is no longer under the shadow of her political godfather, Sen. McCain.

But, it was a perfect storm and everything was against them this election cycle. And yet, this is in no way a blowout by President-elect Obama.
You don't think this was a blowout?

Dude, get real.

This was a clear across-the-board repudiation of all things repub, going back to St. Ronnie and Dick Nixon.

Dead and buried under running water, with their heads cut off, their mouths stuffed with garlic, and big fat wooden stakes driven through what some have called their hearts.

The national repubs have effectively been pushed back to that handful of states best known for their high levels of ignorance and obesity.

You know, the oldest of the old south.

Add to that mix the states dominated by crazy-ass mormons, along with Alaska, with its nation-leading rates of alcohol abuse and rape, and you've got the repub base.

And that's not a base that wins national elections.

There's still more to be done in consolidating Democratic gains and expanding the party's reach into the libertarian-leaning west - most notably Montana, with Texas as a longer-term project.

Add in Arizona, on the basis of its Hispanic population; and Georgia, on the basis of the Atlanta megopolis, and you're looking at a generation in the wilderness, my friend. At least a generation, and likely more.

As for the repub's second stringers - it's a sorry ass bench, indeed.

By all means, bring back Newt. He's full enough of himself to be blind to the loathing and animosity so many harbor towards him. There'll be many long knives unsheathed the moment he walks in the door, and much chaos once he's disposed of.

It'll be a bloodbath, though fun to watch from this side of the fence. And it couldn't happen to a more deserving fellow.

Bring back Caribou Barbie, of course. I mean, she did such a terrific job her first time out, didn't she?

Mad Jack might just as well have tied two boat anchors, several anvils, a large boulder, and an old DeSoto to his ankles with a big fat chain, and jumped right into the middle of Big Bear Lake for all the good that Miss Alaska did to his final shot at The Prize.

She'll be available in 2010, because she sure isn't going to stand for re-election in the face of certain defeat. Mitt Romney can fill her in on the wisdom of that course.

As for old three-hundred-million dollar Mitt, man of the people - I suspect that the moneyed bigots who backed Prop 8 (congrats, by the way, on enshrining hate into the California State Constitution) were also laying the groundwork for a field organization to support his second run for the gold in 2012.

Ya gotta hand it to the mormons - even though their religion is about the wackiest around, they've figured out ways to make lots of money, and they don't give up easily.

Anywhoozle, I'm gonna go light up the big fat cigar I've been saving just for this day. It was hand-rolled from the finest aged Cuban filler and binder, with sweet shade-grown Connecticut River valley wrapper. I've kept it stored in my personal cigar vault.

I got it from my compadre, Eduardo, who's also supplied cigars to that drug-abusing pedophile with the radio show, what's his name...Rush?

But Eduardo says he's packed that man's most recent supply with a few little surprises.

Big storm sure came, eh?

I initially wrote this as a comment at Buggs Bunny's Evil Twin's blog, and have made minor edits for style before posting it here.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Mad Jack Gets Ass-Fucked. Hard.

Now get your saggy old wrinkly ass outta here, you worthless fuck.

photo by jill greenberg

Mad Jack Quits Early, Says "Fuck it."

Hankx to flitedocnm @ hte Great Orange Satan
All hail, Dark Lord Kos.

Monday, November 3, 2008

Dirty Fucking Hippie YouTube Monday - Election Eve Edition

This one's for all of my wingnut friends.

"...all the children are insane."



In May 1967, The Doors made their international television debut by recording a version of "The End" for the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation (CBC) at their Yorkville Studios in Toronto [6]. It remained unseen since its original broadcast until the release of The Doors Soundstage Performances DVD in 2002[6].

I believe that this is the performance mentioned.

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Will She Also Do Phone Sex?



Staff and candidate - as thick as shit.

Hankx to the Editors at the 'Tute

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Word to Mad Jack - Watch Your Back

Hey, there's nothing I like better than seeing rats chew each others' legs off - not so much to get out of the trap as to free up more fodder for the wood chipper.

So, in that spirit, here's Wolfie (a dude who needs a serious on-air ass fucking) talking to Dana Bash (who's welcome to give me a blowjob, also on-air) about Caribou Barbie's delusions of grandeur...



Hankx to Safi via the always bodalicious RenaRF

All hail, Dark Lord Kos

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Opinions Are Like Assholes

Because everybody has one, and they all stink.

At least that's what my mother always told me.

Speaking of assholes...



So, the McFail campaign has fallen so low that they've decided they have nothing to lose by sending some lying sack of shit semi-coherent dickbreath out on the campaign trail.

Smart move.

This "Joe the Fuckwad" character is some piece of work shit, ain't he? He's such a loose cannon that even the guy at Fox "news" doesn't quite know what to make of the little monster that they've helped pull out of the bottle.

Just one more week...

Hankx to Think Progress via Sadly, No!

Monday, October 27, 2008

Dirty Fucking Hippie YouTube Monday



OK, well-fed, well-groomed, wealthy, and aged former dirty fucking hippies. It's still an awesome song.

She's Just Asking What Other Wingnuts Are Thinking



This woman is a fucking idiot.

Mandatory insertion - All hail, Dark Lord Kos!

Saturday, October 25, 2008

It Was a Pitiful Cry for Help

"And then they said it was all because of my 'Shine On Rays' bumper sticker"

Before she faked her assault and tried to incite a lynch mob to hunt down an imaginary blackity-black black dude, card-carrying college republican Ashley Todd, 20, of Texas claimed late last Sunday night that several angry Red Sox fans pulled her out of her car while she was sitting at a stoplight on Boylston Street, near the corner of Arlington, dragged her to the steps of the Bull and Finch Pub, best known as the inspiration for the popular 90's television show, Cheers, threatened her with several 42-ounce Louisville Slugger baseball bats autographed by David 'Big Papi' Ortiz, broke her glasses, and branded the Boston team's logo on her forehead.

"Her story changed several times," said Boston Police Detective Shawn Hennesey. "Though she claimed to have been singled out because she said she was an avid Tampa Bay fan, we became suspicious when she insisted that the Sox starting lineup included Paul Pierce, Tom Brady, Cam Neely, and Tom Menino."

After being released with a stern admonition to "cut the shit," it appears that Todd left Boston and drove straight through to Pittsburgh via Crazytown.

Friday, October 24, 2008

Another Most Awesome Campaign Photo

Republican Presidential candidate John Sidney McCain III speaks to an audience in East Bumfuck, Kentucky on the subject of family values and the importance of traditional heterosexual marriage.

Answers to the two most frequently-asked questions about this picture:
No, it is not Photoshopped
Yes, it really does seem like they're not even trying anymore

Hanks to Michael at BagNewsNotes

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Did McCain Just Say 'Cunt?'



Why, yes. Yes, he did.

Hanks to slinkerwink at the Great Orange Satan.
All hail, Dark Lord Kos.

Bonus

(GASP!) Foulmouthed McCain's also a fucking SOCIALIST!!11!!

Monday, October 20, 2008

Dirty Fucking Hippie YouTube Monday



Well, maybe children of dirty fucking hippies...

Tuesday Added Bonus

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Shorter* Rightwingsparkle

"Of course Colin Powel endorsed Obama today. What did you expect? He's a fucking nigger."

original picture via the most excellent Dave Neiwert at Orcinus

*‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™

- - -
Bonus

Game over.

- - -
Some added thoughts

I've never been a big Colin Powell fan. I'm just not ga-ga over generals, particularly ones who glommed on to the likes of Richard Nixon, Henry Kissinger, old George Bush, Dick Cheney, and pissant George Bush.

You can get a measure of a person by looking at the people they hang out with, and Colin Powell's spent the better part of his career hanging out with pure scum.

Then there's the matter of his little PowerPoint presentation at the U.N. If he thought he was lying, or disagreed in any way with his buddies' collective hard-ons for war, he should have resigned and then gone public with it all. After all, his ultimate duty is to us, right?

If he had as big a hard-on for war as his buddies, or even if he was only semi-turgid, then he's a fucking douchnozzle who's committed crimes against humanity, just like the rest of the Cheney administration.

I'm the only sibling in my family who didn't do a hitch in the military, but I have a pretty good layman's understanding of its culture and values, and the most valued trait in that culture is loyalty to the chain of command. Colin Powell's nothing but a good soldier, with all that entails, and in the end his nature is to salute and respond with a clear "Yes, sir!"whenever he's told what to do.

I can see the importance of that value when the shit's flying and people are getting killed, but when it comes to informed decision-making at the highest levels, and the over-riding interests of a nation, an open mind and willingness to disagree when that's what's called for (and isn't that the only real way to serve a president?) trumps everything else in my book.

So, to the extent that Colin Powell's opinion in this matter influences those folks who still haven't gotten it through their thick skulls that a Mad Jack presidency would be the final flush on our national turd, well...fine.

And I do appreciate how well Colin Powell catalogued the many ways in which the McPain/Failin' ticket has fouled our electoral discourse even more than previous republican campaigns - something that I didn't think was possible, though to be honest the repubs always seem willing and able to dig down even deeper into their cesspool of election tactics, no matter how deeply they've dug before.

But, in the end, as far as Colin Powell is concerned, I'm completely with Fightin' Digby on this one:

No president should ever take advice from this man again.

Saturday, October 18, 2008

What Would Jesus Do?

I've toyed with the idea of retiring, or at least semi-retiring, almost from the moment I started this shitty little blog.

Sure, watching what wingnuts are up to, and calling them on their bullshit, is a worthy task. But really, where does it end? Wingnuts are like cockroaches - it's easy to see several at a time, but for every visible wingnut, it turns out that there are at least another hundred hiding in the dark cracks.

Wingnuts won't engage. It's not in their genes. So, attempting to reason with them, in the hope of perhaps helping one or two see the light, or at least consider alternative views, just ain't gonna happen. And fucking with their heads for a few laughs stops being fun after a while, like poking too long at a dead squirrel's carcass with a stick.

I really kind of shot my writing wad with the essay on Mad Jack's craptacular speech at his nominating convention a little over a month ago, and since then I've been mostly cruising with YouTubes and short comments.

It's like Jesus said, "The stupid fuck-ups will always be with us. Why not just kick back with a few cold ones and a nice big fattie? Life's too short, bro."

So, I may be slowing things down a bit - visiting and commenting at fewer g-list wingnut blogs, and posting even less here than I have already.

But before I do, I just wanna give a shout out to a couple recent online acquaintances:

Bugs Bunny's Evil Twin - you're as insanely wingnutty as they come, but I can't get rid of the nagging suspicion that you're somehow just a little different than the rest of your assylum mates. Maybe it's because you actually seem to have a sense of humor, or because you never deleted any of my posts. I can even respect the loyalty you showed to your own friend, Crybaby Ray, when he got all teary because I called him an asshole. He's still a douchenozzle crybaby who should get the fuck out of the kitchen if he can't take the heat, but you stood with him, in a sense, and that's noble.

Erik - Grow some fucking gonads, dude, and stop deluding yourself with the thought that you're somehow gonna get a fair shake trying to engage wingnuts. It just ain't gonna happen. They're simply not capable. You're embarrassing yourself. It's like you want to be Alan Colmes or something. Fuck that shit. Find a better rolemodel. Mohammed Ali, perhaps. Or Hunter S. Thompson. OK, maybe you get a point for trying, anyway. But, Jesus H. Motherfucking Christ - can you maybe try harder?

My outlook and positions have been formed over the years by many influences, and like any living thing they continue to be refined, and in some instances, changed. That's not gonna stop.

For those of you handful of visitors who are so inclined, I strongly urge you to read - I mean really read - the work of Robert Altemeyer. It's essential for any understanding of wingnuts (or, in his terminology, rightwing authoritarian followers), as well as for any understanding of the psychopaths who exploit them.

And no attempt to fully understand people like Dick Cheney, or pretty much any elected republican, is possible without familiaring yourself with the work of Robert Hare.

Both of these scholars are included in my blogroll 'Fighting teh Good Fight.' You'll also find some of my own favorite bloggers in that list, people and communities who have helped shape and validate my views.

And there are lists of the many lefties I love, along with other interesting shit, worth poking around in. Please, do that, too.

So, this isn't exactly 'good bye.' The obsessive piece of my psyche prevents me from leaving entirely. And I plan to continue visiting and participating at my favorite sites. You'll always be able to find me hanging out with the good folks over at Sadly, No! or, as I like to call it, the Algonquin Roundtable.

I also plan to continue with what has turned out to be a very popular regular feature here, namely Dirty Fucking Hippie YouTube Monday. There's always room for some good music, right?

And finally, for you wingnuts who sometimes drop by, the invitation to blow me is always open. If you're not into that, you might consider sticking your tongue up my asshole.

Don't knock it 'til you've tried it. My friends.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

You Know Who John Sidney McCain III Sounds Like?



John Sidney McCain III sounds just like a farmer with terminal cancer, trying to borrow money on next year's crop.

I can't take credit for that one. It's Hunter's. And he didn't say it about Mad Jack, he said it about The Hube back in 1972.

Hunter hated Hubert Humphrey, and like pretty much everything else Hunter hated, he let the rest of us hear about it.

I didn't pull my old hardcover copy of Fear and Loathing: On the Campaign Trail '72 down off the shelf this year. I seem to have settled into an every-other-election pattern with it, and this is an off-year. But I know that quote is in there somewhere.

It's a good one. It's very apropos. I think Hunter would have liked Obama. I know he would have hated Mad Jack.

And to all my wingnut friends: Better take cover. Big storm coming.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Mad Jack's 'Ah, Fuck!' Moment



Man, some staffer's gonna get fired over this one. Poor McStain thought he was getting in a real zinger, only to have it tossed back in his face like a warm, peanut-studded turd.

Loverly.

All hail Dark Lord Kos.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

News Reader Gets One Right

Y'know, they say that even a blind pig finds an acorn now and then, and, apparently, so, too, with some of the blow-dried news readers on teevee.**

Good for you, sweetie.



Juan Cole said it better, and in greater detail, last Saturday.
Worse than the lady's confusion between Arab and Muslim were her further obvious confusion between Muslim and dangerous.

Mr. McCain, Arab-Americans and Muslim-Americans are decent, family-oriented citizens. The only thing wrong with calling Obama by either of these modifiers is that it would be incorrect. He is not an Arab ethnically, but rather northern European and Luo (Nilotic). He is not a Muslim but a Christian.

McCain's insinuation that "Arabs" (whether he and his friend actually meant "Muslims" or not) are not decent and not family-oriented and not citizens is obscene.
**Hanx to eurthamudtoes at hte Great Orange Satan
All Hail! Dark Lord, Kos.

Monday, October 13, 2008

Dirty Fucking Hippie YouTube Monday - Redneck Style



Fuck Eric Clapton. Duane Allman is god.

Bonus

And maybe Stevie Ray Vaughan is associate god ;^)

Saturday, October 11, 2008

Flyers Fans, 2; Caribou Barbie, 0

hanx to hyper at the Great Orange Satan
read danger durden's story and listen to the fans boo

All hail, Dark Lord Kos

Friday, October 10, 2008

Wingnuts on Parade, Part 3



Bonus

Yesterday I linked to a video that was subsequently pulled from YouTube. I suspect it was because the video stream was captured from a Fox "news" broadcast.

Fortunately, I found another version via Michael Shaw's most awesome Bag News Notes. Be sure to read Michael's own take on what this video reveals about McP.O.W.
When the fire breather...gets up and announces he's really hot, what does McCain do? He encourages the guy with a vigorous thumbs up so that, when the guy follows by shouting how angry he is about "the socialists taking over our country," the frenzied crowd jumps to its feet in approval. Of course, McCain couldn't look more smug as the guy finishes his rant.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Wingnuts on Parade, Part 2

D'oh! YouTube pulled this video.

What's more pathetic - this stupid fucking wingnut audience member with a microphone at a McP.O.W. rally, or the fact that he's more coherent, and maybe slightly less demented, than the fucking candidate?

I know - it's a rhetorical question.

Bonus



This video, along with the one featured yesterday, was produced by the brave and mysterious Tim Russo over at blogger interrupted.

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Dirty Fucking Hippie YouTube Monday (Tuesday)



Watching Hef's minions trying to dance and act hip is too funny. You need acid to dance to the Dead, not gin, dammit.

Most of those folks went on to become wingnuts and/or spawn them.

As for the band - they seem to be having fun, trying to cram a 45-minute song into 1/10th that time. Crappy editing also helped.

Mickey Hart has got to be tripping, and the young Bill Kreutzmann sure looks an awful lot like the young Bill Murray. (warning - slow, shitty link to IMDB).

Bonus

Fuck it, here's the picture:

'That one' what?



Oh...

Ah, ha ha ha ha ha!



Bonus!

Sunday, October 5, 2008

Live by the Sword, Die by the Sword

Wingnut Fantasy

I'm sure I'm not the only male in America who, when Palin dropped her first wink, sat up a little straighter on the couch and said, "Hey, I think she just winked at me." And her smile. By the end, when she clearly knew she was doing well, it was so sparkling it was almost mesmerizing. It sent little starbursts through the screen and ricocheting around the living rooms of America. This is a quality that can't be learned; it's either something you have or you don't, and man, she's got it.
In making his instantly famous comment (if by 'famous' we mean 'pathetic'), uber-wanker Rich Lowry simply said what every other chickenshit wingnut has been thinking all along - "Man, would I love some of that."

Palin debate screen capture via BagNewsNotes
photoshopped McCain by Jill Greenberg

Bonus
On the grounds between the two brick colleges, the chitchat between the scion of four-star admirals (McCain) and the son of a prizefighter (Dramesi) turns to their academic travels; both colleges sponsor a trip abroad for young officers to network with military and political leaders in a distant corner of the globe.

"I'm going to the Middle East," Dramesi says. "Turkey, Kuwait, Lebanon, Iran."

"Why are you going to the Middle East?" McCain asks, dismissively.

"It's a place we're probably going to have some problems," Dramesi says.

"Why? Where are you going to, John?"

"Oh, I'm going to Rio."

"What the hell are you going to Rio for?"

McCain, a married father of three, shrugs.

"I got a better chance of getting laid."

Dramesi, who went on to serve as chief war planner for U.S. Air Forces in Europe and commander of a wing of the Strategic Air Command, was not surprised. "McCain says his life changed while he was in Vietnam, and he is now a different man," Dramesi says today. "But he's still the undisciplined, spoiled brat that he was when he went in."


from Make-Believe Maverick by Tim Dickinson, in the current issue of Rolling Stone

Hanx to pattisigh at The Great Orange Satan - All hail, Dark Lord Kos

Monday, September 29, 2008

Dirty Fucking Hippie YouTube Monday - Now With ACTION STEPS



I know my chickenshit wingnut friends don't like to swear, so please don't feel obligated to to sing along to words like "hell," "damn," or "fuck."

I do, however, hope these same chickenshit wingnuts will be inspired to go where they normally fear to tread, namely here, here, here, or here.

But I'm not gonna hold my breath.

Bonus

Saturday, September 27, 2008

Paul Newman, 1925-2008



from The Verdict

from Roger Ebert's review
This is the first movie in which Newman has looked a little old, a little tired. There are moments when his face sags and his eyes seem terribly weary, and we can look ahead clearly to the old men he will be playing in 10 years' time. Newman always has been an interesting actor, but sometimes his resiliency, his youthful vitality, have obscured his performances; he has a tendency to always look great, and that is not always what the role calls for. This time, he gives us old, bone-tired, hung-over, trembling (and heroic) Frank Galvin, and we buy it lock, stock and shot glass.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Dirty Fucking Hippie YouTube Monday - Late Again



Better late than never.

Now stand proud, motherfuckers.

Bonus

Sunday, September 21, 2008

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Hey, John Sidney McCain III - FUCK YOU!!11!



Major league Thanx to sweetliberty

All hail, Dark Lord Kos.

Bonus!

Monday, September 15, 2008

Dirty Fucking Hippie YouTube Monday

Because good friends, breathing, and tradition matter...

Sunday, September 14, 2008

John McCain is a Sick Old Fuck



Seriously. The guy should be sitting in a lounge chair at a secluded VA hospital.

Alaskans Tell Palin - "Eat Shit, Asshole."

Never, have I seen anything like it in my 17 and a half years living in Anchorage. The organizers had someone walk the rally with a counter, and they clicked off well over 1400 people (not including the 90 counter-demonstrators). This was the biggest political rally ever, in the history of the state. I was absolutely stunned. The second most amazing thing is how many people honked and gave the thumbs up as they drove by. And even those that didn’t honk looked wide-eyed and awe-struck at the huge crowd that was growing by the minute. This just doesn’t happen here.

(snip)

So, if you’ve been doing the math… Yes. The Alaska Women Reject Palin rally was significantly bigger than Palin’s rally that got all the national media coverage! So take heart, sit back, and enjoy the photo gallery. Feel free to spread the pictures around (links are appreciated) to anyone who needs to know that Sarah Palin most definitely does not speak for all Alaskans. The citizens of Alaska, who know her best, have things to say.

Big, big thanks to AKMuckraker

If you're interested in watching the rise, and inevitable crash, of the celebrity repub vp candidate Miss Alaska, you've got to get over to Mudflats.

I mean, where else can you turn - Charlie Fucking Gibson?!?

Bonus!



Hanks to frsbdg

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Sarah Palin Doesn't Know What the Fuck She's Talking About



She doesn't have a fucking clue.

I wish this was all a joke, but some people actually think that it would be a good idea to vote for McP.O.W. and this crazy, ignorant, opportunistic bint.

Of course, Sparkie's gotten herself all wet over this one.

Hmmm, is she a closet lesbian?

That's got me thinking...



Update - This was not a well-thought out post when I first tossed it up here, I admit. The combination of an interview with Miss Alaska, a reference to Rightwingsparkle, and some girl-on-girl amateur porn (including highway noises just outside) may seem gratuitous, at best.

I guess one of my points is - if I'm going to subject myself to the insane ramblings of Sarah Palin and Rightwingsparkle, then perhaps at least I should have the opportunity to make their virtual interaction more palatable. I guess the only way that I could consider either of these hate-filled bimbos worth paying attention to would be for them to go at each other with fingers, tongues, and dildos.

Now that would be interesting, and would at least have some merit.

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Yeah, Another YouTube

This goes out to all of you chickenshit wingnut weaslefucks who just can't get your war on fast enough.

Most of you have never been any closer to an actual war than through your X-box consoles and Sgt. Fury comics.

And for those of you who've who've plastered your blogs with comments like "I have proudly served," and who have decorated your pages with assorted military trappings and iconography, yet who still bellow for more blood - if you are to be believed, if you actually were in the military and aren't just making shit up because, you know, this is the internet where that shit happens all the time, well you obviously haven't learned a single fucking thing from your experience.

That is, if your "experience" didn't just consist of delivering mail on base, typing forms, and driving some other asshole around in a jeep.



I was a Marine myself, in the early 80s. And as a chaplain's assistant, I helped counsel the families of the men killed in the suicide bombing in Beirut, in 1983. Some were guys I'd known. For a week, at Dover Air Force Base, as the bodies were shipped in planeload by planeload, I talked to mothers, wives, fathers, and brothers. Where did they want their loved ones buried? Had anyone talked to them about their survivors' benefits? Did they need help with the forms? Administrative details of grief.

One young woman - a girl, really - had been a bride at 16 and was now a widow at 17. She asked to see her husband's remains. The coffin was tagged, so I knew what was inside. Sort of. I cautioned that she should remember him as he had been, rather than see him as he was now. But she insisted, and she was legally entitled.

So I opened the box.

Inside, wrapped in plastic, was a left hand. All they'd found, or all they could identify.

She almost broke. I almost broke, too, and still do as I type this.

Then she asked for his wedding ring.

I put on rubber surgical gloves, as we'd been trained to do, and carefully opened the plastic. I slid the ring off of his finger, and washed it with an alcohol wipe. Then I put it in her palm, eyes wet, my lip trembling. Don't, I thought. You have to be strong for her.

Her hand closed on the ring. She looked at her fist for a moment, then up at me. "Why?" she asked.

I knew a dozen stock reasons to give her. He gave his life for his country. He served bravely. All the standard lines. All the standard lies.

"I don't know," I said, the only honest answer I could give.

The whole piece is here.

Monday, September 8, 2008

Sunday, September 7, 2008

Because I'm Too Lazy



This Stranahan kid is pretty good...

Update - It's been noted that the site referenced at the end of the video has been flagged by Google as a bad, bad one. So, go to the dude's YouTube page for more videos.

Funny, funny shit.

Saturday, September 6, 2008

In Her Own Words



I mean, seriously, if this isn't surreal comedy gold, nothing is.

"No balls," indeed.

Friday, September 5, 2008

Songbird's Swan Song


Did you know that John Sidney McCain III was once a prisoner of war?

Yup, it's true.

He was a prisoner of war for five and half years, starting back in 1967, when his plane was shot down over Hanoi, in Vietnam.

What was he doing up in a plane over Hanoi? Why would the Vietnamese want to keep him in a prison?

As John Sidney McCain III said himself, "I was a war criminal. I bombed innocent women and children."

Once when John Sidney McCain III was bombing innocent women and children in Hanoi, somebody down on the ground shot a wing off his plane. John Sidney McCain III and his plane fell out of the sky like rocks, right into a lake. They kept falling like rocks, too, and sank down deeper and deeper into the water.

One of the Vietnamese who saw this happen, a guy named Mai Van On, rushed out and swam into the lake where John Sidney McCain III and his plane were sinking. Mai Van On actually pulled John Sidney McCain III out of the water.

If Mai Van On hadn't swum out into the lake, John Sidney McCain III would have drowned right there and then, and the only people who would know anything about John Sidney McCain III today would be his mother, and any sisters or brothers, if he had them and they were still alive. And also his friends, if he had any of those.

His first wife, whose name is Carol, would also still know about John Sidney McCain, III, of course.

But probably none of the ladies that he fucked after he got home from prison would even have a clue that he ever existed. That is, I mean, all the ladies that he fucked when he was still married, but cheating on his wife, Carol.

John Sidney McCain III's second wife, a very rich woman named Cindy whose very rich dad sold lots of beer in Arizona, and who was a lot younger than John Sidney McCain III, and who was fucking him like a crazy bunny rabbit even though he was still married to Carol, which makes her an adulteresss in the eyes of people who say they like to read the bible and other books like that, Cindy also wouldn't have known that John Sidney McCain III had ever existed if Mai Van On had not saved John Sidney McCain III from drowning after he bombed innocent women and children.

Because if John Sidney McCain III had drowned that day in Hanoi, he never would have committed adultery so many times, and he certainly would not have married a very rich young pretty woman.

John Sidney McCain III was very lucky that he didn't kill Mai Van On when he was bombing innocent women and children.

Now, I don't know about you, but if somebody was dropping bombs on innocent women and children and me, I'd probably be very mad. And if I saw a plane crash into a lake after it dropped bombs on me and innocent women and children, I don't think that I would swim out into that lake to save the person who was flying the plane and who was really the one doing all of the bombing, because planes don't drop bombs - people in planes drop bombs.

I'd probably say something like, "Well good for you. Go ahead and drown. You won't be able to bomb anybody when you're dead. And you won't hurt your wife by cheating on her, too. Good riddance."

The other Vietnamese were very mad, so when they got their hands on John Sidney McCain III after Mai Van On pulled him out of the water, they pushed him around, and beat him up, and locked him in a small cell that didn't have any light. Maybe they also tried to kill him first. I don't know.

I also don't know what they gave him to eat in that prison, but it probably wasn't very good, and there probably wasn't very much of it.

I bet they made him shit in a bucket, or in a hole. Maybe his bed was right next to that hole. Or maybe he didn't even get a bucket or a hole to shit in, or a bed to sleep on, and instead John Sidney McCain III had to sleep in his shit and his piss right there on the floor in that dark little prison cell.

Who knows?

The guards in the prison in Vietnam screamed at John Sidney McCain III a lot, and they tried to scare him. They hurt his arm and his leg, because he broke an arm and a leg when his plane hit the water after it was shot down. When somebody hits your arm or leg after it has already been broken, it hurts a lot, believe me.

John Sidney McCain III did not have much fun in that prison, if he had any fun at all.

Sometimes the guards didn't let him sleep. That's called 'sleep deprivation,' and it can make a person crazy because we all need to sleep.

Sometimes they made him stand up for hours and hours, or they made him squat down for hours and hours, too. That's called putting somebody in 'stress positions,' and it hurts a lot and can also make a person crazy, like when you sit on the toilet too long and your legs fall asleep and it's hard to stand up and walk for a few minutes.

Why did the guards in Vietnam do these things to John Sidney McCain III? Why did they hurt him and make him crazy?

They did that because they wanted John Sidney McCain III to tell them things, like how many other men in planes did he know were bombing innocent women and children. That's called 'interrogation.'

They also wanted to trick John Sidney McCain III into saying things that they could use as propaganda. Propaganda is stuff that isn't really true, but that can be used to fool other people into thinking that it is true.

Propaganda is confusing.

John Sidney McCain III knows a lot about saying things that aren't true, but that confuse people into thinking that maybe what he says really is true. Maybe John Sidney McCain III learned how to confuse people so well because he learned it in Vietnam. He certainly talked a lot when the guards asked him to. He talked so much that the other people that were also being held in that prison gave him a nickname.

The other prisoners called John Sidney McCain III "Songbird," because he talked so much whenever he was interrogated, and because he said so many things that could be used as propaganda - just like a bird that sings a lot, sitting in the tree outside your window. Only I don't think that the other prisoners thought that John Sidney McCain III was pretty, like a real songbird.

I think John Sidney McCain III made the other prisoners really mad.

I can't blame him, because if somebody was hurting me and trying to make me crazy, I'd tell them anything that they wanted to know. I'd even make up things that I knew weren't true if it would make them stop hurting me and trying to make me crazy.

Would you do that, too? I bet a lot of people would. I bet a lot of people do.

Anyway, one day John Sidney McCain III got out of prison, and later on we all became pretty good friends with the people in Vietnam, though I think John Sidney McCain III is still pretty mad about what happened to him, because he still likes to call them "gooks" even today.

Calling a person from Vietnam a gook is like calling a black-skinned person a 'nigger.' It's not a nice thing to say at all.

Are the Vietnamese people still mad at John Sidney McCain III because he bombed innocent women and children in Vietnam? I don't know, but it might be a good question to ask somebody. Maybe John Sidney McCain III knows, but if he does he isn't telling anybody.

Oh, one more thing. Some people call what happened to John Sidney McCain III when he was in prison, when his guards yelled at him and hurt his arm and leg, and hit him, and didn't let him sleep, and made him stay in stress positions and sleep on the floor in his own piss and shit, some people call all of those things 'torture.'

But it's not. John Sidney McCain III wasn't tortured when he was in prison in Vietnam. Not one bit. Not at all.

There's even a very long and complicated story that some lawyers wrote that say it wasn't torture, and those lawyers worked for the President of the United States, so they must know what they're talking about. The President of the United States says that he can do to other people what the guards in that prison in Vietnam did to John Sidney McCain III, anytime he wants to, and for any reason he says, or even for no reason at all.

But the President of the United States, and his lawyers, says that he doesn't actually torture people. They just say that they like to use 'enhanced interrogation techniques.'

And now John Sidney McCain III wants to be the President of the United States, too.

I wonder if John Sidney McCain III wants to be the President so he can torture use enhanced interrogation techniques on people. If so, that would be a pretty funny reason.

But John Sidney McCain III isn't very funny. Not at all.

Anyway, now you know that John Sidney McCain III was once a prisoner of war. If I didn't tell you, you probably wouldn't know, because John Sidney McCain III doesn't like to talk about it, and he doesn't want other people to talk about it, either.

But John Sidney McCain III wasn't tortured. Anybody who says that John Sidney McCain III was tortured in Vietnam is calling the President of the United States a liar.

- - - -

John Sidney McCain III said he bombed innocent women and children here

This is what says that John Sidney McCain III wasn't tortured

- - - -
Bonus

You would never know it from the media coverage but John McCain is not one of America’s greatest war heroes. He is a former POW who survived, heroically. He deserves to be honored for that heroism.

But one thing distinguishes McCain from other war heroes, the kind whose heroism changes history rather than their life stories.

America’s two greatest war heroes were Ulysses Grant and Dwight Eisenhower. Grant saved the union. And Ike saved civilization.

And neither one ever bragged about their experience. (Can you imagine Ike smacking down Adlai Stevenson by saying that while Adlai ran a nice medium-sized state, he was the Supreme Allied Commander who ran D-Day, defeated Hitler, and liberated Europe?).

Impossible. Like Grant, Eisenhower did not brag.

Actually, modesty about military accomplishments is typical of war heroes and not just here. In Israel, it is unheard of for great military leaders to brag about their service.

Former Prime Minister Ehud Barak was the most decorated soldier in Israel’s history (he was a commando who, among other amazing feats, dressed as a woman — with a handful of soldiers — invaded a terrorist stronghold in Beirut, killed the terrorists, and then fled to a waiting dinghy and headed home). Yitzhak Rabin led the IDF in its Six Day War victory. Ariel Sharon saved Israel from destruction in 1973 when he snuck up behind the Egyptian army and encircled them in the Sinai.

None of these guys talked about it. McCain does. Continuously. His lack of modesty — about something war heroes tend to be modest about — does not become him.

From MJ Rosenberg at TPM
Hanks to justme at Sadly, No!

Thursday, September 4, 2008

SaRah! Rah! Rah!

"After we're done with today's pep rally, I'll be out in the parking lot to give blow jobs to every starting player on the football team.

For you basketball and baseball players, it's handjobs only.


When I turn sixteen, the entire hockey team can fuck me in the ass.

But no intercourse.

I'm saving that for when I marry my boyfriend."

occam's hatchet rules


Bonus! 'specially for my fundie wingnut friends
Jesus was a community organizer and Pontius Pilate was a governor.
All hail, Dark Lord Kos

Bonus #2 - Miss Alaska if full of shit
Seriously - she's filled to the brim

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Meet the Fucknut(s)

Dare to be Stupid...and Lazy

I've had some new visitors recently, and since my shitty little blog is a rundown shack on the side of a weed-filled dirt road, every visit is a special occasion. My door is always open, and I never turn anybody away.

Still, I gotta tell ya, this fucking idiot really has me scratching my head. At first, I was really flattered when he dropped off his little rant. I mean, just look at all of those commas.

But when I followed the link to his own shitty little blog, it turns out that his comment here was just a cheap copy/paste job from his post there.

Or maybe he copied his comment and turned it into a post?

I dunno, it's confusing.

In any event, in looking over the comment thread he's generated, it looks to me like Fucknut went out to rustle up the group hug that he really wanted all along. Good for you, Fucknut. Good for you.

And I've found a whole new bunch of friends who have such fascinating things to say!

Sarge: "If Richard Nixon, a Republican, had not been totally paranoid, he might have left office a hero for ending the Vietnam War and opening up China..."

J_G: "After four days of negative messages to a depressed constituency the democrats were dealt the coup de grĂ¢ce from John McCain and the Republican party. Sarah Heath Louise Palin, the current Governor of the State of Alaska has been nominated by John McCain to be his running mate and will undoubtedly be the next Vice-President of the United States."

ECM: "If you're a conservative like me who's tired of going to the movie theater and getting blasted with liberal politics then welcome to my blog!"

Z: "NOW, can SOMEBODY tell me where Fred Thompson was during HIS campaign for the presidency? WHAT a speech he gave tonight, huh?! YIKES! What alien forces had his innards when he was running? Man, was he fantastic."

Fantastic just isn't the word for it, my friend.

Monday, September 1, 2008

Dirty Fucking Hippie YouTube Monday - Special

Tonight's music video is going out with a special dedication to Sarah and Britney Bristol Palin.



This is one of the most freakin' awesome rock performances ever filmed, and has always been my personal Woodstock favorite despite the annoying triple-split-screen bullshit gimmick that they used to present it.

Now, everybody knows that John Sidney McCain III was a P.O.W. for five and a half years.

But what most people don't know is that for the last two of those years his NVA captors would play this song, real loud, right outside his cell at every guard change, just to taunt him. Most NVA regulars played a mean Alvin Lee-style air guitar, too, right down to the pouty lower lip.

True story, but one that John Sidney McCain III doesn't like to talk about.

Sunday, August 31, 2008

Mandatory Sarah Palin Post

Who? Me?? Crazy?!?
Fuck no, I'm not crazy!
Why? Do I look crazy?

OK, so I got the word that everybody who runs a shitty little blog that is even remotely associated with U.S. political and current events absolutely must post commentary on McP.O.W.'s insane pick for a running mate, so this is mine.

Sorry, but I gotta do it. Otherwise, I could lose my license.

Who the fuck knows what this is all about? I haven't read anything on the wingnut blogs that makes any sense, though that's no surprise.

But after giving the matter much thought, while sitting out on the patio with several of my patented Honolulu Hickies (fill a large glass with 151-proof rum mixed with fresh-squeezed lime juice, crushed ice, and a splash of grenadine), I've come up with these possible explanations:

1. This was Mad Jack's personal decision. As such, it demonstrates his complete inability to think things through and consider the consequences of his actions. It's the sign of an impulsive and irritable mind, the kind that leads a person to crash 4 planes and get a fifth one knocked out from under him.

It shows how the asshole still follows the lead of his 72-year old, Cialis-dependent and opportunistic dick, just as he did at a younger age by engaging in serial adultery and taking out a marriage license for a wealthy trophy bride before his divorce from the woman who stood by him, even after suffering serious injuries in a near-fatal car crash, was final.

In short, this pick shows McCain being the dangerous and thoughtless prick that he's always been. This video showing him staring at her ass while fiddling with his wedding ring underscores the point.



Hanks to JedReport

2. This was not Mad Jack's personal decision, but rather a decision forced upon him by one or more political advisors. As such it demonstrates his complete lack of control over his own campaign, as well as his total willingness to do whatever somebody else tells him is needed to win, no matter how fucked up that advice actually is, or would appear to your average fifth-grader.

I don't believe for a minute that there's any political upside for the campaign. None. Nada. Zilch.

To those who argue that it was a brilliant move to drown out Obama's successful Denver convention, I'll just point out that the record-setting thirty-eight million people who saw Obama's speech pretty much represents the entire universe of people who actually gives a shit about this stuff. No loss there.

It was more likely a huge blessing that we were spared the endless bloviations of the talking heads and other hangers-on in the traditional corporate media who would have been all too eager to give us their sorry spin on what we actually saw ourselves.

A ploy for women who supported Hillary? Puh-leeze. As Tbogg aptly put it, a PUMA has the body of a middle-aged woman and the head of an idiot. There are about 6 of them. Three were never going to vote for Obama no matter what, two aren't even registered, and the sixth doesn't own a car or have access to public transportation.

If Mad Jack got this decision handed to him by the people who are sucking up big wads of campaign cash in return for such 'advice,' all I can say is, "Dude, pay me half, no, wait, fuck it, one quarter of what you're paying any one of these fuckwads, and I guarantee I'll give you better guidance than they ever have, or ever will. And I don't agree with a fucking thing you stand for, and I've never run a campaign at this level before, but I swear to fucking christ it's not gonna be anything like the sorry bullshit they've been selling you."

I mean, seriously, this has to be the most ridiculous, half-assed campaign I've ever seen since Sam Yorty folded his tent and finally got those rabies shots he needed back in 1972.

It's like they're not even trying. Which leads me to...

3. Mad Jack and friends have jumped the shark, and they know it. This makes a lot of sense to me, and I'm usually not much on grand conspiracy theories.

But think about it - the Cheney administration has made such a hellfire mess of absolutely everything, from our economy to our infrastructure to our role in world affairs that nobody could even remotely hope to begin setting things straight in a generation, let alone a four-year presidential term that actually works out to about 18 months before re-election campaigns kick into gear again.

Why not just throw this race (with or without Mad Jack's agreement) and sit back for a few years? Let the Dems take the heat for the coming shit with control of the White House, the Senate, and the House of Representatives. Then ride in gloriously sometime around 2011, led by shiny new "agents of change," maybe even including a resume-enhanced Miss Alaska.

It's like a successful crook who decides to lay low for a short period, not pressing his luck, enjoying the fruits of his labors, and giving the rubes enough time to let their guard down before hitting them again for even more.

Then again, this could just be yet another part of an overall fuck-up of epic proportions started on January 20, 2001 and that'll toss the republican party out to the fringes, where it properly belongs, for the next 100 years.

Anywhoozle, whatever the reason, or the result, it sure has been fun checking in on what some of my favorite g-list wingnuts have had to say about the dirty-minded old fuck and his ditzy new girlfriend.

Sparkie gushes in the way that only she can:
Palin has injected into this candidacy an excitement and glee that I haven't seen since Reagan ran for President.

One of Sparkie's most deluded commenters offered this insightful nugget:
I think that for many people, they want to vote for Obama simply because it will "make history." And yet with the pick of Sarah Palin, they still get to make history, but with someone they're more comfortable with. After all, there are more women out there than blacks.

My latest online pal, Buggs Bunny's Evil Twin, also invoked every wingnut's favorite demented corpse:
What Gov. Palin brings is a conservative future for the Republican party. Not a grumpy one but a lot like another Republican maverick-Ronald Reagan.

And finally, this institutionalized individual used the occasion to develop a new euphemism for masturbating:
Palin is the shot in the arm that the country and the party needed. Her speech with McCain yesterday had me clapping to myself as I listened to the radio.

Yup, he's voting for Sarah Palin allright - in his pants.

Bonus - The wingnut mouthpieces were against Miss Alaska before they were for her...



Hanks to Clarknt67 at the Great Orange Satan
All hail, Dark Lord Kos!

Double Bonus!!11!
Gov. Palin's 17 yr old daughter is five months pregnant. McCain knew and it didn't change his decision. McCain just isn't afraid of anything politically or otherwise, is he? Any other politician would have run in the other direction.

Of course McP.O.W. knew all about this, since his choice was so carefully vetted.

This also proves that abstinence-only sex "education" works, dammit.